My Dream Emmy Nominations 2014

I don’t like how you can just choose to be in any category.  Fargo had 10 episodes but it’s a Miniseries and True Detective has 8 episodes and it’s a Drama show.  So, everything is messed up and I had to weed through a lot of pictures to find where everyone can be actually nominated.  And, it’s the last season of Breaking Bad and first of Orange is the New Black.  Plus, I haven’t watched Boardwalk Empire yet.

       

 Comedy Show

• The Big Bang Theory
• Community
• The Mindy Project
• Nurse Jackie
• Orange is the New Black
• Veep

These are the shows I thought had the best seasons, not the ones that will be chosen.  I thought Girls, Parks and Rec, Modern Family, New Girl and Louie all tapered off this year.  Even though they were canceled, I had a weird, embarrassing soft spot for Trophy Wife and The Neighbors – more proof of that to follow.

Comedy - Actress

• Lena Dunham, Girls – Nudity is one thing but wearing a bikini while riding a bike is something else.
• Edie Falco, Nurse Jackie – She’s back to being bad and interesting.  Fuck rehab!
• Mindy Kaling, The Mindy Project – She has the best throw-away lines – I hope she writes them.
• Julia Louis-Dreyfuss, Veep – I have an affinity for people who are quick to anger and swear a lot.
• Amy Poehler, Parks and Recreation – She’s still good though the show is down. 
• Taylor Schilling, OITNB – She’s one of the least likable characters - It must be the acting, right?

Honorary Mention:  Wendi McClendon-Covey, The Goldbergs – Just for the sweaters.

Comedy - Actor

• Jake Johnson, New Girl – I like his fuck-up of a character and his voice when he screams.
• Matt LeBlanc, Episodes – Watching him be the anti-Joey is fun.  And he swears a lot!
• Joel McHale, Community – He’s never gotten any Emmy love.
• Chris Messina, The Mindy Project – Alright, your pop culture over-saturation has won me over!
• Jim Parsons, The Big Bang Theory – He doesn’t need to win again, but he’s good.
• Adam Scott, Parks and Rec – I know Andy Samberg will take his spot.

HM:  Bradley Whitford, Trophy Wife – I love him and his wild and crazy hair.

Comedy – Supporting Actress

• Danielle Brooks, OITNB – It makes no sense that she’s in this category.
• Anna Chlumsky, Veep – She’s My Girl, yo.
• Kate Mulgrew, OITNB – She’s a marshmallow on toothpicks, but a complete badass.
• Aubrey Plaza, Parks and Rec – She and Andy are the new Pam and Jim but meaner and dumber.
• Merrit Wever, Nurse Jackie – Fuck yeah, she won last year.  Her abrupt speech means she might be  like Zoey in real life and that’s not a bad thing.
• Anna Deveare Smith, Nurse Jackie – She’s cool and tough and mean.

HM:  Samara Wiley, OITNB – even though she shouldn’t be in this category either.  She’s a lesbian named Poussey – accent a droite, bitch!

Comedy – Supporting Actor

• Ty Burrell, Modern Family – He’s the best thing about that show.
• Kevin Dunn, Veep – He gets  the best lines that make fun of everyone else.
• Tony Hale, Veep – I’m glad Buster found his vocation.
• Ed O’Neill, Modern Family – Everyone else on the show has won except him and Sofia.
• Chris Pratt, Parks and Rec – I do prefer chunky Andy to buff, superhero Andy; it’s more believable.
• Simon Templeman, The Neighbors – I know the show is dumb, but he was odd and funny.

HM:  Andre Braugher is far more probable, but I really liked Albert Tsai on Trophy Wife.  Yeah, I know, I have a problem.  Move on…

Drama – Show

• Breaking Bad
• Game of Thrones
• The Good Wife
• Justified
• Mad Men
• True Detective – Though I’m not apeshit for it like everyone else. 

Shows that have a shortened or summer schedule tend to get lost.  I don’t really remember what specifically happened on Downton Abbey, The Newsroom, The Bridge, The Killing or Sons of Anarchy.  I remember the big stuff.  Some were just bad:  Homeland, House of Cards.

Drama – Actress

• Lizzy Caplan, Masters of Sex – I doubt she has a chance but she’s Janis from Mean Girls
• Julianna Margulies, The Good Wife – This is one of the girlier shows I watch.
• Tatiana Maslany, Orphan Black – The only non-believable part was the transgendered one.
• Elisabeth Moss, Mad Men – How will it end for poor Peggy?
• Kerry Washington, Scandal – This is the girliest one.
• Robin Wright, House of Cards – She is icy and looks amazing.  Why is she engaged to creepy Russell from Six Feet Under?

HM:  Diane Kruger on The Bridge – She was stoic and awkward, maybe she’s a stand-up.

Drama – Actor

• Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad – Last call for Walter White.
• Jon Hamm, Mad Men – He’s never won and there’s only one more chance.
• Woody Harrelson, True Detective – He's had a good year.
• Matthew McConaughey, True Detective – His transformation was cool.
• Timothy Olyphant, Justified – He’s just cool – there’s no other word for it.
• Kevin Spacey, House of Cards – Though the show really declined, he’s good.

HM:  I know they have no chance:  Andrew Lincoln, Charlie Hunnam, Jonny Lee Miller and Clark Gregg (Go you, Huskies).

Drama – Supporting Actress

• Christine Baranski, The Good Wife – She’s always good.
• Laura Carmichael, Downton Abbey – Screw Mary and her suitors; come on, sad sack Edith!
• Lena Headey, Game of Thrones – She never gets Emmy love, but her incest-born son did die.
• Michelle Monaghan, True Detective – I really like Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, so this is for that.
• Maggie Smith, Downton Abbey – She’s a sassy, old broad.
• Bellamy Young, Scandal – She’s got several rights to be bitchy.

HM:  I thought Joan sucked on Mad Men and Anna Gunn won last year.  I do like Emily Mortimer and Joelle Carter.

Drama – Supporting Actor

• Peter Dinklage, Game of Thrones – He did some stuff this season.
• Walton Goggins, Justified – Though they never explain why a racist hillbilly is so eloquent. 
• Mandy Patinkin, Homeland – Gotta love the Tink.
• Aaron Paul, Breaking Bad – One last chance for Jesse Pinkman.
• Jeff Perry, Scandal – He’s a very, very bad man (and not because he’s gay).
• Peter Saarsgard, The Killing – He can be creepy on TV as well as film.

HM:  Way too many – Jere Burns, Josh Charles (RIP), Elias Koteas, Gerald McRaney, Vincent Kartheiser.

The guest actor categories make me angry.  To me, a guest actor should be 1 or 2 really memorable episodes.  Many candidates are in most of the season and are just not in the supporting category, but they only submit for 1 episode.  So, I looked at all the pics and tried to base it on if it was ‘a very special episode of Blossom’ or not.  Except for Uzo Aduba – she’s just incredible.

Comedy – Guest Actress

• Uzo Aduba, OITNB – I‘d throw my pie for her.
• Sarah Baker, Louie – And then everyone made fun of her weight on the internet – way to go, America!
• Laverne Cox, OITNB  – Get ready for the first trans-gendered Emmy nominee (hopefully).
• Gaby Hoffmann, Girls – How is that crazy bitch the girl from Uncle Buck?
• Taryn Manning, OITNB – Those teeth…
• Julie White, Nurse Jackie – She ran into the buzzsaw that is Jackie.

Comedy – Guest Actor

• Walton Goggins, Community – One of the best episodes of Community EVER.
• Rob Lowe, Californication – A very weird, over the top character.
• Christopher Meloni, Veep – I couldn’t watch his new show, but he was good here.
• Mike O’Malley, Glee – His character has always been amazing, but I won’t be watching this episode again.
• Pablo Schreiber, OITNB – Porn-stache!
• Ben Schwartz, Parks & Rec – Jean-Ralphio in the house!

Drama – Guest Actress

• Allison Janney, Masters of Sex – So much different than CJ Cregg.
• Shirley MacLaine, Downton Abbey – The perfect match for Maggie Smith.
• Carrie Preston, The Good Wife – Any show would be better with Elsbeth Tascioni.
• Diana Rigg, Game of Thrones – Just for getting rid of Joffrey.
• Dana Wheeler-Nicholson, Nashville – You can’t escape white trash family.
• Alicia Witt, Justified – Bad family, worse decisions…

Drama – Guest Actor

• Dylan Baker, The Good Wife – He’s always memorable and super-creepy.
• Michael Bowen, Breaking Bad – Did Uncle Jack drive the Pussy Wagon?
• Walton Goggins, Sons of Anarchy – Last season's episode was more shocking but he wasn't in the running.
• Harry Hamlin, Mad Men – I really like him in this role.
• Hamish Linklater, The Newsroom – He was so jerky and smarmy – way different than Christine’s brother.
• Michael Rapaport, Justified – A nice boost to the cast.

I don't watch a lot of these, but I have to do some picks because of Fargo which was the best thing on television this year.

Miniseries/Movie

• American Horror Story: Coven - This was the first season I watched.
• Fargo – In-fucking-credible!
• The Normal Heart - Sad and infuriating.
• Psych The Musical - Only episode I've ever seen, woke up early one morning.

Miniseries/Movie – Actress

• Jessica Lange, American Horror Story – I can't believe how they make her look - she's so brave!

Miniseries/Movie – Actor

• Martin Freeman, Fargo – He is amazing and should win everything forever!
• Mark Ruffalo, The Normal Heart - He was okay compared to these two.
• Billy Bob Thornton, Fargo –  Very good, but he's no Lester.

Miniseries/Movie – Supporting Actress

• Kathy Bates, AHS - She's always good, even as a super-racist.
• Frances Conroy, AHS - She plays a weirdo well.
• Audra McDonald, The Sound of Music Live - She's got some pipes.
• Julia Roberts, The Normal Heart - She better not beat Deputy Molly Solverson.
• Alison Tolman, Fargo – And she was right all along!!

Miniseries/Movie – Supporting Actor

• Christian Borle, The Sound of Music Live - Sure, why not?
• Keith Carradine, Fargo - Badass Step-Grandpa!
• Martin Freeman, Sherlock - I haven't seen it yet, but he should win everything.
• Danny Huston, AHS - Good enough